This past year I’ve digested over 1,000 articles, books and videos on personal development, clarity, happiness and human behaviour.
I’ve grown, cried, laughed, and now I’d like to share the best articles with you.
Every week will feature a personal growth topic and I will hand-pick the most impactful, inspiring and practical articles/videos/books I’ve come across on that theme.
This week’s topic is perspective.
Our behaviours are based on assumptions (mental models) of how things work. Unfortunately, many of the assumptions we developed from social conditioning or past experiences actually hinder us from our personal greatness and cause suffering instead.
The articles below are about uncovering assumptions, questioning their validity and forming new assumptions that lead to more personal fulfillment.
The articles below will test and change your assumptions on:
- What makes you happy
- Tolerating people and things you don’t like
- Beliefs that hold you back from greatness
- Whether you are the same as your thoughts (very profound idea)
- What you need from others in relationships
- Having a self-identity tied to your job
I’d love to know what you think about these articles.
Why are we unhappy even when we get what we want?
Here’s a talk from Srikumar Rao, a professor and life coach, about our flawed “I’d be happy if …” mental model for happiness, and how to embrace our natural “hard-wired happiness.”
I found this talk to be light-hearted and very insightful about where we should invest our happiness.
Tolerance Is Resistance to Love (article)
This article changed my belief that “tolerating” things was noble: spending time with people I didn’t like but felt obliged to, doing activities I didn’t enjoy because someone else wanted to, working at an unfulfilling a job because its the responsible thing to do.
It also changed my belief that “quitting” means failure – the author argues that it actually takes more courage to quit doing what you don’t connect with; and when you experience relief from quitting it’s a sign you’re letting more of your real self shine through.
“If you can’t summon the courage to quit what you know you don’t want, you certainly won’t have the strength to receive and hold onto what you do want.”
6 Steps to Eliminate Limited Beliefs (article)
This touching article challenges discovers limiting beliefs that hold you back. The 6 steps outlined are very practical and simple to follow, yet extremely effective for bringing awareness to your assumptions.
The article is easy to read, but there is a lot to digest because the key ingredient to changing your beliefs is your own self-reflection.
I read this book a year ago and it changed my life. I had epiphanies and cried because the teachings rang true inside me. If you’re ready for major life change, this is the book.
The book is about consciousness, awareness and realizing that we are not the same as our thoughts (very profund if this is a new idea for you). Thus, mental chatter, suffering and unhappiness are only dark spots in our minds that we have the power to relieve with the light of our internal awareness.
The book begins with the author’s emotional near-death experience and the clarity that came out of it:
“I cannot live with myself any longer”… “Am I one or two? If I cannot live with myself, there must be two of me: the ‘I’ and the ‘self’ that ‘I’ cannot live with. Maybe… only one of them is real.”
(If possible, I recommend reading this book in solitude.)
After reading this book, I realized many things I was looking for from others were actually all things I could only give to myself. Paradoxically, my capacity to unconditionally love and accept others has become larger than what I could have ever imagined.
Another book on a similar topic by the same author is I Need Your Love – Is That True?: How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them Instead.
This was the first book I ever read about personal growth and it planted the seed for me quiting my job 2 years later.
The book points out the absurdity of tying our self-identity tied to our jobs, the importance of leisure time, and being more productive by working intelligently.
If you’ve been at your cubicle job for too long (or even if you haven’t), this is a great book to (re)discover your passions. Plus lots of hilarious but true quotes about working.
The author was a Canadian engineer who escaped his cubicle in his late 20’s.
>> What articles, books or videos would you add to this list? Let me know below.
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